Our Vacation

Last week we were on vacation, our first big family vacation as a family of 4.  Sure, we have gone to NJ to see family, but this was a trip to the Outer Banks, NC.  The drive from Canada to NC (yes, I said drive, we are still terrified to fly with the children) is 14 hours, we decided that doing this trip straight through was completely insane, so we decided to head to NJ on Thursday, leave for NC Sunday, stay until Friday, head back to NJ, then on Sunday drive from NJ to Canada.  In total, we were in the car for about 36 hours in 10 days... 36 FREAKIN' hours!  (More on that later)
Before I talk about what 36 hours in the car with two kids under the age of 4 is like.. I want to talk about our brief stay in NJ.  So, my daughter turned one August  9th.  Because we live in Canada, and have no family and limited friends up here, we decided to forgo the birthday party up here and plan TWO while we were in NJ.  Yup, TWO birthday parties on our two day stop in NJ.  Because both my parents and my husband's parents are divorced, it gets tricky planning things when we don't have a house to host events.  So Friday afternoon we planned a small party with my mother in law (which we really just had to show to up to, thank god!) and Saturday I planned to have one at my dad's house.  Now is the time to mention that my husband turned 30 yesterday, so I was feeling pretty guilty that I wasn't going to be able to have anything for him.. a month or so before we came home for vaca, I was having a grumpy day and told him "if you think you are getting a party for your 30th you can forget it, you moved us up here, and now we have to have 2 parties for little lady in 2 days, I just can not plan a 3rd."  He understood, but then the guilt set in.  My husband is pretty frackin' awesome.  I had to do something.  So I then had the  brilliant idea to have a surprise party for him after little ladies birthday party on Friday.  I arranged sitters for the kids, and somehow pulled it off, he had no idea, and our friends are awesome and helped with set up and food.  What I had NOT planned for was that my husband would be up drinking until 4 am with his best friend contemplating the meaning of life and solving all of the worlds problems.  I woke him up the next morning to get him to help me to get everything ready for little ladies party #2, and he was pretty  much useless.  This is how our conversation went:
Me: "D- you have to get up, its 10:30, we need to leave here in an hour to get the kids and set up for the party.  You have an hour to get your shit in gear, spend the hour how you want, but you need to get up and ready in an hour"
D-"ugghhhh"
15 minutes later he walked into the bathroom and was standing there like a zombie.
Me-"you have 45 minutes.. get in the shower and get ready"
D-"ughhh, why did you wake me up so early?"
Me-"its almost 11, its not my fault you think you are 21 and can stay up drinking until 4, we have to leave here by 11:30, get your ass in gear, I am not kidding."
D-"I think I need to eat"
20 minutes later I come out of the bathroom, ready to go, and he is standing over the sink
Me-"D-I am not joking with you, we NEED to leave in 15 minutes.  You need to make yourself presentable.. we have 25 people coming to my dads and you look like death, GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!"
D- "I need to eat, but I can't, I feel sick."
Me- "I am leaving now, I will take care of everything, you have ONE hour to get to my dads, I don't care how you get there, but you need to get there!"
(I called my brother and arranged a ride for him"
So off I went, by myself to pick up the kids, get little lady down for a nap at my dad's house, to go pick up the food and cake for the party, while my husband was clinging to his life and feeling ALL of the effects of staying up until 4 am.  He did show up within the hour time limit I gave him, looking much better courtesy of a wawa breakfast sandwich.
The party went along great, the kids all got along and played nicely.  It wasn't as elegant as some other parties I have been to lately, no huge spread of food, just some sandwiches, I didn't have party bags (seriously everyone just throws that shit away anyway) and when it was time to cut the cake, we didn't put a candle in it because she is one, she can't blow out a damn candle.  We gave little lady a slice of cake, and she wanted nothing to do with it (she must not be mine, little lady HATES cake!  Who hates cake?!?)  But overall, it was a nice party, as nice as it was going to be for planning it from Canada, and also planning another party at the same time!

The day after the party we headed to NC. (again, I will go into more detail about the car rides) We were looking forward to 5 days on the beach... think we got 5 days on the beach?  Not a chance.. it rained pretty much the whole week.  We got one nice sunny day that we could head to the beach.  Overall it was a nice day, we decided to try to get little lady to nap on the beach since we didn't get there until 11, when going to the beach with kids its not just a towel, sunglasses and sun screen as it was in our pre-kids days.  It is tents, and umbrellas, snacks, drinks, toys, changes of clothes.  Thinking back, I think one day was just enough, the kids both loved it, but it is just so much damn work!  The rest of the week we hung out by the pool between rain showers, went shopping, and tried to relax as much as possible with 2 kids.  We even got one night out where my mom offered to watch the kids so we got to go out for dinner, walk up a light house, and take a nice long walk on the beach.

Friday we packed up and headed back to NJ, for a 1 day recoup day from the car ride, just to get back in the car Sunday.

The car rides, OH the car rides.  As I stated earlier, we were in the car for about 36 hours with the kids in a span of 10 days.  36 hours... if you want to know what 36 hours in the car with a teething one year old is like, stab yourself in the ear with a chop stick, now have someone sit behind out and throw things at you.  The first trip to NJ was rough, little lady screamed for most of it.  It wasn't a crying scream, it was a "I CAN NOT BELIEVE YOU ARE MAKING ME SIT STILL FOR THIS LONG!" scream.  My husband says that she is going to have a future in horror films, we have NEVER heard a baby scream as loud as her.  The ride was bad, but we knew we had vacation to look forward to, so our spirits weren't too damaged.  Sure we were stressed and had developed a slight tick by the time we got there, but we knew happier times were to come.  The ride from NJ to NC wasn't AS bad.  Little lady wasn't thrilled with the trip, but we were able to keep her a little happier, but again, we knew happier days were coming so we stayed positive... now the rides from NC to NJ, and then NJ to Canada were not so great.  Little lady screamed for most of the rides.  Nothing I could do would make her happy.  I gave her something for the pain of teething, I sat with her in the back seat, I played games, gave her toys, set up a little DVD player, nothing worked... she was PISSED.  The ride to Canada was particularly horrid.  We got stuck at the boarder for over an hour, little lady screamed with anger the ENTIRE time.  At one point I told my husband I wanted out, and if he would have let me out of the car I would have walked home.  My husband and I were beyond grumpy, we were starting to turn on each other.. in that moment it was all his fault.  It was his fault we were stuck at the boarder... if he had not moved us to Canada to begin with, we would never be stuck in the car with the screaming monster.  Yup, it was his fault..

I am not sure that my husband and I will ever fully recover from our 36 hours in the car, I mean I am sure that the ear aches will eventually go away, but the huge scar it has left on our spirit will probably always be there.. it was torture, and I am not sure that we will ever be right again.  I am already dreading our ride home in October, and I can only hope and pray that little lady has her molars completely in and we can have happy ride home.  But until then, little lady has us right where she wants us, scared.