Day 5- Mommy Wars

This week seems like it has been a bit brutal in the mommy world.  I read quite a few mommy blogs, and there were many posts this week about the mommy wars.  Two in particular stand out.  Anderson Cooper had mommies on his show this week, there was apparently a study done that says that working moms are happier than stay at home moms.  I want to believe that Anderson (yum.... the silver fox).. had the ladies on to talk about WHY there was a happiness gap, that is what he said he was doing anyway.  The show quickly turned into a shit flinging competition between the working vs stay at home moms.  I kept watching, waiting to hear the reasons WHY working moms were happier, or to hear more facts about the study, because that was supposed to be what the show was on... but there was not much mention of the study.  I watched, like one would watch a horrific accident, it was ugly, brutal, with all parties leaving feeling bruised, and I just couldn't look away.  I was so pissed at the venom being thrown around on the stage, I sat down to write a blog about it, I have been both a working, and a stay at home mom, but I left it alone, not wanting to add fuel to the fire.  But the whole time I was watching this horrific monstrosity of mothers flat out attacking one another, I just wanted to scream at the TV.  "What the fuck ladies, get your shit together!"

Another blog I read was defending mothers who blog, FB, or tweet about their children occasionally getting on their nerves.  Apparently it is pissing of some moms who believe that we should not express ourselves if our children are making us occasionally crazy, because when you put it on the Internet, our children could grow up, and find it and it would hurt them.  Seeing that I have a mommy blog, and I occasionally bitch about my kids, you know which side of the fence I am sitting on this one, but the fact that some perfect woman out there is condemning those of us who want to express ourselves, and share our experiences with other mothers, seeking connections and letting others know, NO your not alone in  getting frustrated with this impossible task of motherhood, really irked me.  I see nothing wrong with even telling our children that YES, sometimes you get on mommy's nerves but I still love you with all of my heart and nothing will change that. Look, if you have perfect children that never do anything wrong, and you never had a bad day in your life, you are lucky.  If YOU think that blogging about your children will damage them in the future if they discover that their mother isn't actually June Cleaver, then don't do it. No one is making you talk about your children via the Internet, but that doesn't give you the right to judge those of us that want a sense of community and are hanging on by a thread to our own sanity.

This week in mommy wars, I am really wondering WHY??  Why do women feel the need to think that their way is the only way?  Why do they feel the need to judge each others choices?  Why does society put mothers in the boxing ring and then think it is acceptable to watch us duke it out? Breastfeeding vs. not, Attachment Parenting vs. not, Working vs Staying home.  This kind of behavior is unacceptable ladies, and frankly, WE CAN DO BETTER.  You would never hear men fighting over their parenting practices.  "Hey Bob, how many baseball games did you take your son to this year? WHAT??? Only 3, Oh you obviously are a shitty dad and will scar your child for life." 

Being a mother already seems like a nearly impossible task, we are all just trying not to fuck up our kids. We already put a tremendous about of pressure on ourselves, we do not need to put any more on each other.  We may have different opinions, and that's OK, we are on different side of the same coin called Motherhood.  We should be fighting the mommy wars together, not against one another.  Shape up girls.